Now Playing: Melt WIth You
Topic: Batman
I was thinking about Batman and how he doesn't have any super-powers but he still beats the crap out of everyone, even super-strong villians with electrical powers who can fly and look like giant bugs. I once read where he beat the crap out of Superman, which is impressive even though he wore a suit of armor and had help from Green Arrow and a big chunk of kryptonite.
Batman knows so much stuff that if he ever went on Jeopardy, he would just never lose. It would just go on forever and ever, and even Alex Trebek would get bored. I wonder if they would let him on the show with his mask and everything? It would be interesting, especially on the part of the show where Alex had to schmooze the contestants.
"So, Batman, do you ever take that mask off?"
"Only when I have to."
"Oh? Ha-ha! And when would that be?"
"I need sleep. But justice never sleeps. I am the night, I am the fear of dead things, of damned things, crushing the bones of injustice as it..."
"OH, kay! Betty, you're first in this round of Double Jeopardy!"
And then I was thinking that King Kong could probably beat Batman. And wouldn't it be awesome if Batman had to fight King Kong on the Planet of the Apes?
I wonder what the talking apes would think about Kong? One one hand, to them, a wild ape would seem like a retarded second grader to them; on the other hand, it seems like Kong is big enough to eat the talking apes by the handful.
So I don't think the apes would be on Kong's side, but obviously they wouldn't be on Batman's side, either. Maybe they would throw Kong and Batman into a death-match colliseum. Or maybe it would wind up a three-way death-match between Batman, Kong, and an army of talking gorillas with rifles. That would be awesome.
And now that I'm thinking about, I bet Batman would still win.
